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15 Reasons I Can Get My Twins
(and all the picky toddlers I work with at my daycare & preschool)
To Eat Anything I Give Them
Getting picky toddlers to eat
Here is how I get picky toddlers to eat anything I give them…
1. i make snacks “mini meals”, with multiple food groups and minimal packaged foods
What you keep in the house and what you serve, is up to you! Despite what wild demands and criteria it seems your picky toddler has today (plain pasta only, orange cheese only, food not touching anything else on the plate…) trust that you can start to make changes to their habits and their behaviors at mealtime. Change is typically slow and gradual for most. (lots of tips ahead on how to do this!)
One great thing to do is switch up those snacks! If you usually serve goldfish and fruit gummies for snack, try serving half of each of those, adding some apple slices with peanut butter and maybe a few fresh snap peas!
You will feel more at ease knowing that you served a variety, and worry less that they are only ‘snacking on snacks’.
‘Snack food’ can be what you make it!
Read this next:
Top 3 Reasons Your Toddler Is Picky & How You Can Change Their Habits For Good
Exactly How You Can Transform Your Picky Eater: A 4-Week Plan
2. i make mealtime about relaxing, hanging out, laughing, talking about our day or weekend
We talk about the squirrels they see out the window, what made them so happy over the weekend, what they want to do with their friends after lunch. All of these things spark joy. We hardly ever sit quietly and stare at each other’s plates commenting on how much we have or haven’t eaten.
We treat mealtimes as gatherings, as experiences to be enjoyed, not a task or a burden we ‘must get through’.
I want toddlers to feel relaxed, unburdened and comfortable at mealtimes. When they feel this way, they are more open to receive new foods.
3. I use food chaining
If you aren’t already familiar with food chaining, this powerful and gradual approach works off of the foods your toddler already eats and loves, slowly inching them to completely different foods by making tiny tweaks over time.
You can read more about the process here: What Is Food Chaining? How To Use Food Chaining To Expand Your Picky Toddler’s Diet
4. I teach them about foods during story time or play time, using real food as props
Play and story time are magic. Why? Because if your toddler is happily playing or enjoying a story you are reading them – they are relaxed and involved. This is EXACTLY where they need to be if they are going to try new foods (relaxed and involved).
I use these beloved times to teach them about foods. I get them hands on with actual foods as we play or read, so they can familiarize and explore in a non-mealtime setting, where they feel completely comfortable and relaxed. Magic, I tell ya.
As it goes, the more your toddler learns, the safer they will feel. And when they feel safe, they eat things they wouldn’t otherwise eat if they felt pressured or fearful of the new food. Most toddlers take sniffs, licks and bites during these play or story times!
Check out these helpful food play books:
Want a FREE instant download of my Transforming Picky Eating Starter Guide Cheat Sheet? Drop your name & email below! We never spam.
Everything you need to know to start changing your picky toddler's habits, today.
5. i eat a wide variety myself, and love the foods I eat
Observational learning happens when we aren’t actively teaching AND when we think toddlers aren’t ‘paying attention’.
Showing toddlers the positive and loving relationship you have with food can make a huge impression, build curiosity and change habits!
“Foods make me happy, I love eating, mealtime is an enjoyable time, I’m not afraid to try something and decide if I like it” – these are all messages we can send to our toddlers at mealtime through actions and expressions alone.
6. I get them involved in meal prep and grocery shopping, often
Giving them some control and some choice around mealtime, and as much opportunity to learn and familiarize with foods, will open their minds, make them more willing, even excited to eat.
7. i’m not afraid to serve snack foods and goodies with a meal
‘Collaborative parenting’ my mom called it once when she saw me interacting with my toddler daughter, and I really loved that! I said to my toddler, “those pita chips are for snack time, put those back for after nap.” And my toddler said, “it’s otay momma, just a lil bit wif lunch, k?” Haha, okay, just a little bit sounds fine.
In this instance – I had my input, she had hers, and we settled with a compromise of both. She ate her foods just fine and without a fuss. Now, if I would have pushed for her not to have them, she most certainly could’ve fallen into a terrible mood that might’ve turned into a tantrum or refusal to eat.
I pick my battles with toddlers by looking at their overall food intake for a week, rather than one single meal. I let them have a say. We collaborate. And if things get out of hand (they only sit and eat pita chips) then, I am not afraid to say that I will take all the pita chips if they aren’t eating their other foods, too. And while sometimes tantrums happen, they don’t happen often because I give them some control of their choices and wishes, often.
Setting boundaries and letting them ‘win’ within those boundaries is the name of my game.
Read this next:
Food Sorting Activity To Try With Your Picky Toddler To Get Them Hands On With New Foods ASAP
Super Simple Dinner Table Strategy To Try With Your Picky Toddler
8. i do baby led weaning
For my twins and the last two babies I’ve worked with, I have done baby led weaning. There is one other toddler who did baby led weaning before coming to me. All 5 of these eaters are non-picky eaters. All the other toddlers (25+) have been described as picky eaters by their parents and displayed picky eating habits at mealtimes.
Less likelihood of picky eating is one of the top reasons I believe that baby led weaning is the best feeding method for most first time families. See all 6 reasons why I believe baby led weaning is better, here: Is Baby Led Weaning Really Better? Yes, I Think So & Here’s Why
And if you’d like to learn more about starting solids with baby led weaning, you can read this post: EVERYTHING You Need To Know Before Starting Solids With Baby Led Weaning
Interested in baby led weaning? Check out my Low stress baby led weaning ebook – a simplified guide for first time moms
Complete with: first foods list, feeding example schedule, how to introduce allergens & more!
9. i spend 4 weeks doing food-focused activities with them when I notice picky eating
When I recognize those picky habits, I nip it in the bud! I know that I canNOT help them change overnight. I know that it is gradual and requires my action, consistency, chill and patience.
Are they sensitive to textures? Do they struggle with vegetables? Do they not like meat? Do they act scared when they see new foods on their plate? Each picky toddler may have different food intolerances and I adapt to each through the 4 weeks.
You can see the exact plan I follow over the course of 4 weeks, here: How To Get Your Picky Toddler To Try New Foods – 9 Tips That Work Wonders
10. i show them that it’s okay if they have preferences
Again, going back to feeling safe and comfortable – it is so important that toddlers feel this way at the dinner table. Imagine if you sat down with people for a meal and didn’t feel those two things. What would you do? Chow? Or sit and wait for the meal to be over?
As we do food activities, read about foods and talk about foods, we also talk about the fact that there are some foods we are going to ‘love so so much’ and some we ‘aren’t really going to like at all, but may like later!’ I take it further and say, “I didn’t care for tofu before, and now I really like it! Especially with a spicy sauce! You can try it and decide what you think too!”
Once I know they don’t like something, I won’t serve it again right away. I also validate their decision by saying “ok”, rather than “oh but it’s so yummy!”
And later, when I do serve it again, I let them know I’ve served it. And, I remind them – sometimes the way we cook foods makes them taste different. I might say, “tonight’s xyz food is really different than how I cooked it the last time. See what you think – same or different?!”
Rest assured, there are LOTS of foods out there for them to try, so no need to push something they truly don’t like. You can find other foods from whatever food group to fulfill nutritional needs and keep variety. They are going to love some and you are going to be surprised now and again with what they do like!
Check out these helpful picky eater books:
For a FREE instant download of Transforming Picky Eaters Starter Guide Cheat Sheet? Drop your name and email below. We never spam.
Everything you need to know to start making lasting changes with your picky toddler, today.
11. i have a cabinet where they choose their own plates, utensils and cups
They feel involved! They are an active part of mealtime rather than a bystander where mealtime is happening to them.
Giving them this responsibility gets them busy, feeling proud and excited! All of which brightens their mood for food!
12. i serve new foods regularly and behave as if we are discovering them together
“Wow! This is so creamy! What do you think”
“Oh! This is wrapped in a tortilla like your favorite burrito! Chomp!”
Rather than me sitting there staring at them, waiting for a response or asking them “do you like it?”, I make it about exploring and discovery.
Using words that describe the foods (creamy) can help your toddler trust in the food more. Mentioning another food they love (favorite burrito), and comparing the two, can also build trust and curiosity, both of which motivate bites!
13. i show them mealtime is safe and fun, instead of punish, bribe or reward
Punishing, bribing and rewarding can feel like the natural thing to do when your toddler refuses food, tantrums and you’ve just had enough of it. However, studies show that these things can completely work against the goal of broadening your toddler’s diet AND even put more strain on the parent-child relationship.
You can read more about why these things don’t work and what else you want to avoid doing with your picky toddler, here: 5 Things You May Be Doing That Make Picky Eating Worse
14. i tell them what to expect and get them involved in food changes
I am all about giving toddlers a heads up about any changes they are going to experience. I validate feelings that come up, reassure them, then move through the new change doing those same things along the way.
I break out our learning towers and have them help with meal prep. We hop on my phone and they choose foods on instacart and then help unload the bags or boxes.
Setting those boundaries AND letting them choose and explore in their own way within their boundaries is what it’s all about!
You can see more about my overall approach with picky eaters, here: EXACTLY How You Can Transform Your Picky Eater: A 4-Week Plan
15. I serve new foods consistently, alongside 2-3 foods they love to eat (and typically when they tell me they’re hungry)
Serving 2-3 things they know and like keeps them feeling safe and comfortable, despite any new foods that might be on there too. And they’ll be guaranteed to eat some things while we slowly work toward them trying the new things. Win! You won’t stress that they’re not eating anything and they will be eating, happily.
And, waiting for your toddler to come to you asking for food, means they are hungry and more likely to eat what you give them because, well, they are hungry!
There you have it! Be sure to check out all of my Picky Toddler posts below. You WILL have a more adventurous eater in 4 weeks if you follow my approach!
Let me know how it goes in the comments or on Instagram.
